Needing That Spoon Full of Sugar...

There's a saying out there that goes, "Each step in our life journey is important for our unique personal development." The saying actually doesn't go like that, but that's the gist of it. It means that in each phase of our lives, we are uniquely tested and challenged in ways that will help us become the best we personally can be. It's great mental medicine and I remind myself of this whenever I go through hard times. Particularly when I see people my age wearing fashionable clothes, dancing with their friends, and being young and fun...and having it all documented in fabulous photographs...while a part of me that had all that shut down and another part decided it would be a great idea to isolate herself in a desert.

I know the grass always looks greener on the other side and really all those people's lives aren't as fabulous as they appear as they dance in fancy ballrooms in New York or swing out in cute forties outfits or have professional photos taken of them as they're being their beautiful selves. I'm only seeing the fluffy nice things, I know.

Still I wonder - why couldn't I have been "tested" like that?

How To Achieve Beanstalkiness?

Scene: At work.

Amy: I was thinking about what you said the other day...what you're dad told you about working: "be useful"... 

(Pause) 

That's it. End of thought. It sounded like something profound was coming, but there wasn't.

Mike-the-computer-fixer-guy: It was half-way there...

Amy: (decides to try again) It's good advice. But I don't think I can do that..."be useful."

Mike: Sure you can. 

Amy: I know I can, but there has to be more to it than that. I'm not a practical person and, honestly, I might spend the rest of my life with my head in the clouds. 

Mike: A lot of people think that. (Pause) But it is possible to have your head in the clouds and your feet on the ground. 

The search continues....

Things Just Happen...

Occasionally, you find yourself doing things and you're not fully conscious of what's going on...like watching another episode of how I met your mother, lacing up your shoes and finding yourself unexpectedly at a park, or filling out an application for teaching English in a foreign country...

Often you snap back into reality and turn off the tv, go home, or return to business as usual. But sometimes you don't...