Adventure: Durian Fruit in Tucson

The last time I had a durian fruit was in 2009 in a botany class taught by the famed Tim Allen. It's notorious for having a terrible smell but amazing-tasting flesh inside. "King of Fruits," I've heard it called and it grows in Southeast Asia. I became interested in eating one again when I discovered that Tucson had a large Asian market on the north side. I finally made it out there last weekend and bought myself a durian...which was definitely an adventure.

After finding my way around the surprisingly-organized grocery store (the Asian markets I'm familiar with are a bit of an overwhelming hodgepodge), I took a few laps around the produce section. However, after searching for 10 minutes, I couldn't find one anywhere. I asked one of the staff members, but he didn't speak English very well and said that they didn't sell them. Disappointed, I was about to leave.

But then I became determined. I had read on a blog post that they WERE there...so I looked it up on my phone and continued to wander. The writer said, "The most unusual fruit is inconspicuously placed in the far right back corner inside a freezer chest box. The chest box contains frozen durian fruit individually placed in green plastic netting."

I excitedly went to the back corner of the store and THERE THEY WERE! Dozens of durians!!

I pulled one out carefully - its spikes made it slightly dangerous. The checkout woman wrapped it in newspaper and then double-bagged it. I walked out very pleased with myself and my find. I felt like I was holding a treasure-bomb. 

I waited a day and a half to let it thaw out. Its frozen state kept it from smelling bad in my refrigerator, but I knew that I could not store it once I cut it open. I had been reading horror stories about people who had to throw out their fridges because the smell absorbed into the plastic.

I went outside at 7:00 in the morning on Sunday before work (and the day before trash day) with a huge knife, some newspaper and growing anticipation. I had no idea what I would find inside. 

I sliced it, but it was still frozen. When they are ripe and not frozen, they look like this:

Mine looked like this:

The photo is a little offensive, I understand. But I was so excited I didn't care! It still didn't smell because it was half-frozen. The inside is a cream and tasted like banana and vanilla custard. It was so delicious and well-worth the cost, trip, and risk of ruining my fridge. 

You can eat them plain or cook with them. It is popular to turn them into smoothies or shakes:

I don't know when I'll have a durian again...probably when I can get a bunch of people together and we can make a party out of it. That way we can eat it all together and maybe make shakes. The best time to buy them, by the way, is in the spring when they are in season and the prices are low ($10-15 vs $20-30). 

I also recommend buying them at least two days in advance to let them thaw, if they are frozen, and to eat it the night before trash day. I'm sure my roommates appreciated my planning on that one.

Career Dilemma: New (Scary) Skills vs Is This Me?

I am looking for a new job and was advised to put a resume up on Monster.com. I did...and used Careerbuilder.com (which has been more useful).  Consequently, I've been contacted by recruiters looking for customer service and sales jobs. I was confused by this...my background is mainly office administration. However, I looked at my resume again and I realized that my latest experience has been mostly client relations. It turns out that a lot of client relations work is "sales."

I never pictured myself as a salesperson. The pressure of doing work for commission stresses me out a lot. Yet I sell every day. I sell our therapists' skills to new and returning clients, convincing them that someone is qualified to work on them and that they do very good work, actually. I also sell our services to people who are price-shopping: we offer quality over quantity, but we do have some discounts going on...

I really enjoy working with people. I like establishing relationships with them, getting to know what they need, and then selling them services based on where their desires intersect what we offer. I like making sure people feel like they are being taken care of. That is the part of sales I like. 

However, I do NOT like trying to convince people to buy something on a cold-call (think mall kiosks and door-to-door people). Rejection is a large part of the selling work and I don't know how well I can handle it on a repeated basis. 

Yet, I'm interested in it and I like learning about it - the communication involved, the body language utilized - and seeing the broader picture of business development at play. I find myself studying sales/customer service reps that I work with to see how their skills are working on me and what I would do differently. Lastly, I like to think of sales as educating people about a service or product and that it's really a partnership operation: we (the business) have something you want (otherwise you wouldn't be here) so let us educate you on your options and find something that fits you. It's service, really, and I like serving. 

I've got one more thing to consider: it really looks like a lot of my options are to go the insurance route, or do some kind of unsavory cold-calling/commission only route in order to get training and learn this business. I'm also worried that I won't be able to find a company I can support. I need to believe in their product/service before I can sell for them. 

Can you see me selling car insurance?? Really?? What happened to introverted, life-analyzing, writer Amy? What is she doing?

Not writing for money, apparently. She could, but that work doesn't appeal to her. She likes talking to people.

I'd really like to work for Intuit right now. That is my goal company. They're a company that designs software for small businesses and they live and breathe their values. And a position as a sales consultant, inside sales rep, and eventually an account manager with them....it sounds nice. Getting in, though, is like entering a forbidden castle. I need skills to persuade that draw-bridge to lower. 

I have a feeling this is a turning point in my career/life. I have a feeling whichever path I choose will not let me go back to where I came from...and that's a little scary...

Movie Report: Her

This is my first "report" on my list of movies I'm watching for the year. I won't report on all of them, but I felt this one was worth mentioning.

Her is about a man who falls in love with an operating system. If you're like me, you're probably thinking, "completely unrealistic," right? But surprisingly, it wasn't. In the way it was depicted, I thought the relationship resembled a long-distance one, as if one person was on the phone the entire time. It was an interesting thing about the OS, though, was how it adapted its tone, behavior, and actions (like pulling up files, turning on devices) to the desires and interests of its owner. It could make the owner laugh, make dinner plans, call his friends, discuss current events, etc. As an audience member, I could see how fake this relationship could potentially be, yet I wanted to believe it. I saw the OS as an invisible person who was nonetheless real. What makes the story even more interesting is the juxtaposition of the owner's failed marriage with this new relationship. He couldn't manage a relationship with someone who was dynamic, who changed, and who was outside of his control (a human in other words); yet he found it fulfilling to be with an operating system who adapted to him and his needs. (This makes me wonder if what he actually loved was another form of himself.)

The film makes you contemplate the complexity of love: how a human loves another being (the components of love and attraction) and how one can love even if the relationship is impossible to maintain.

Rated R for good reason, I still highly recommend this movie. Very thought-provoking on all sorts of levels.

Book Report: Being Both: Embracing Two Religions in One Interfaith Family

When I was in middle school, I wanted to marry a Jewish boy. I think it was because I had met a funny rabbi and therefore believed most Jewish men were funny. (Of course this is a stereotype, but I have met many funny Jewish men since.) Also, I was intrigued by the religion that fathered my own and wanted to learn about it and embrace it. However, in high school I discovered that interfaith marriages were discouraged by both Christians and Jews. Moreover, it was particularly frowned upon if the mother was not Jewish, because then the children "wouldn't" be Jewish. Realizing my unappealing state to this community and not wanting to ostracize my children, I let my marriage ambitions go.

Then in college I came into contact with Muslims. Again, I became intrigued by their culture and beliefs. I participated in a couple Ramadan events while I was a student, and chatted about religion with those I knew from class or the dorms. My high school experience deterred me from considering marrying anyone except a Christian, but I still wondered, "Could such a thing be possible?" To be perfectly honest, I think I often felt like I should marry a Christian, because that was easiest and probably best. But I don't think I necessarily wanted to.

Fast-forward to the present. I happened upon a book at the library, Being Both: Embracing Two Religions in One Interfaith Family. This was it! I thought. Finally a book to answer my nagging questions about interfaith marriages: were they possible, were they doomed?

According to the author, they were possible and they were not doomed. She discussed her own experience growing up in an interfaith family and talked about growth of communities for such families. She also gave examples of marriages that included a mix of Jew, Christian, Muslim, Hindu, and Buddhist people. All of these gave me hope. The common denominator that I noticed for why these marriages worked was that the people were not fundamentalists or literalists of their holy texts. It seemed to me that they believed their faiths shared core values and that their religions were different manifestations of those values. This was cool, but I saw one area of concern: none of these people seemed to believe that there was only one Way.

To me, religion is like a a multi-layered orange. When you get past the rituals, texts, and desired behaviors, you arrive at the path/deed/belief to salvation - the core. In my mind, if you deny your core - the belief that there is one Way - you are taking out the center piece that holds everything together...the rock...the foundation. What is the point of practicing if don't believe in your foundation??

Yet, many people who are in interfaith marriages are actively engaged in their religions and in multiple religious communities. They ask questions and seek answers. These people want to understand, because the cohesion of their families depends on it. They are probably more on board with their faith than many of those who are in single-religion families. They are confident in what they believe and why.

So where do I stand? At this point in my life, I believe there is one Way for me. Yet I believe we all find God through different avenues and they can all be right. We live in a world where people of different countries, cultures, races, and religions are constantly moving and connecting with each other every day. For some of us, marrying someone who has a similar background as us is difficult and - honestly - less appealing. While forming interfaith relationships and families may not be easy, it's nice to know it's possible to do and that they can succeed.