Sunday, December 25, 2016

Sewing and Self-Image

I'd been experimenting with dress designs over the last several weeks, trying to find something I liked and could communicate to a dressmaker. I researched and read forums about fabrics and cuts so that I would know what to ask for. In the process, I developed an interest in sewing a dress myself. Previously, I always thought homemade dresses looked untidy and at best, basic. Therefore, I preferred to purchase my dresses, because even if they were done by a "cheap" professional, they looked like they had, in fact, been done professionally: the edges were clean, the dress shapes were uniform, and the details were complex enough to convince anyone it hadn't been done by first-time sewist. However, my preferences began to change out of curiosity. As I drew dresses, I wondered if I could sew my own.

Two weeks ago, Ibrahim and his former dance partner Megan had gotten together for a drink and pizza. I declined to join them because it was a weeknight. Looking for another opportunity to have us meet, Ibrahim invited her and her husband, Matt, over for his weekly Sunday grilling party. They were nice people and I enjoyed talking to them. When Ibrahim shifted the conversation to dance costumes, Megan mentioned that Matt sewed and also repaired old sewing machines.

"Really?" I prompted.
"Yeah!" Matt replied. He explained how he went around to goodwill, garage sales, and searched craigslist for old Singer sewing machines, pre-1960s. He enjoyed fixing them as a hobby, just for the sake of fixing them and figuring out how they worked.
"So do you have a bunch of machines sitting around your house?" someone asked.
"Well, I do have a few, but I try to find a good home for them."
"Do you sell them?"
"No, I give them away."

He continued, talking about how these machines last a long time because their parts are made of cast iron and metal, as opposed to the plastic of many modern machines. He discussed the different parts of the Singer machine and the quality of stitching they performed. Matt also described modern machines and how they did have useful/efficient functions that the old ones do not. Sergers, for instance, cut fabric and stitch at the same time, which is incredibly efficient for making clothes. I was fascinated.

That night, I went to bed envisioning sewing machines and fabrics. The next day, Ibrahim gave me Matt's number and I texted him saying I wanted to give one of the sewing machines a new home. 

Now I have a new machine and I'm excited about sewing. However, at the same time, I'm not exactly sure where to start. This might sound strange, but I'm also having a bit of identity confusion. I have a limited background in craft projects, and I've never considered it my forte. Now I have a sewing machine and there's so much potential...yet I wonder if my time would be better spent doing something else. People tell me, "You're smart...what do you want to do (with that intelligence)?" ...Dance...sew dresses...Not that those occupations are for unintelligent people, but I feel more like I have a capacity that I'm not utilizing. As it is, I'm going to give sewing a try. See what happens. If I really do like it, I'll continue. I admit that the idea of making my own pants and dress clothes someday (clothes that are my style and fit me well) is very, very appealing. 

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